Mediation is a type of non-adversarial dispute resolution that may be utilized in almost any civil situation, including contracts, leases, small businesses, employment, child custody, and divorce. In a successful mediation, all interested parties work collaboratively toward a settlement or fair resolution of their problem while aided by an impartial mediator who helps guide the process. So what are the fundamentals to keep your mediation on track toward an equitable and satisfactory conclusion? Here are ten guidelines to bear in mind.

Participating in a mediation entails being personally engaged in all of the events that occur throughout any mediation session, gaining a realistic grasp of the problem, and having the opportunity to express opinions and concerns. Physical presence is the greatest type of participation, but when it isn’t available, participating via video conference or speakerphone might be acceptable.

Documents are important in resolving a dispute through mediation. Mediation necessitates working through the differences of opinion concerning a problem, and documents are certainly helpful in achieving that objective. For example, it’s critical to have the covenants, conditions, and restrictions physically on hand for a mediation session when discussing a conflict between a homeowners association and a condominium owner.

Every participant in a conflict generally feels that their viewpoint is the correct one. In a mediation, the question “Who is right?”—that is, who will ultimately win if no agreement can be reached and a lawsuit ensues—is crucial because realistically assessing the prospects of ultimate victory determines which of the alternatives for resolution are realistic. Parties in a mediation, however, should not concentrate only on convincing each other (or others) that they are right (or more correct than others).

In mediation, the objective is to reach a resolution. Achieving resolution necessitates a large amount of work in order to discover options that would satisfy both parties. Finding alternatives that satisfy both sides is much like creating a commercial contract. If it does not benefit both parties, there is no bargain. As a result, in mediation, you must consider not only your own needs, but also those of your adversary.

It’s critical to obtain verbal agreement (consent) throughout the mediation. A person who has been ridiculed is unlikely to give consent. And a party who feels disrespected is more likely to be sidetracked by this, which is bad for the mediation process. This isn’t about “getting along.” It’s all about avoiding disrespectful behavior that isn’t necessary.

In a successful mediation, you must be able to show why your position on the substance of the issue is correct, as well as how any potential agreement might benefit both sides.

Knowing your own best interests is critical, but it isn’t the entire job in mediation. The other side has interests, and you need to know what they are. Identifying the other party’s interests is frequently more difficult than identifying your own. Initially, this necessitates some degree of guessing, but once a mediation session starts, you may inquire about things and get information from what the opposing side says.

Reconciling interests necessitates problem-solving, and problem-solving demands creativity and an open mind. No notion is rejected or condemned; instead, concepts may be built on top of one another. The best ideas are typically discovered towards the end of the process after people believe they’ve run out of alternatives. After a number of choices have been identified, the parties may scrutinize them and choose those that are best for each side based on their benefits.

Many people believe that their anger indicates that things are not progressing well, and they should terminate the mediation. This is incorrect. Even if the parties disagree over what constitutes a fair solution, they may still reach an agreement if they agree to terms that better represent their interests than no deal.

Each side may or may not be aware of their own interests and those of the other party, and each might have unrealistically high expectations. Each party may be unwilling to deal with the other in a decent manner. It takes time to address these concerns, as well as time for people to reconsider their viewpoints. Parties in mediation must give themselves some time for this process to work. This is the most crucial of the ten guidelines for a successful mediation.